Every time you chase certainty, you create paralysis. Because certainty can’t be found in the future.
It took me decades of sitting with my stuckness to realize that every time I was stuck, I was actually just scared of the consequences.
A great decision isn’t one where you get what you want. It’s one where you stay who you want to be, no matter the result.
I find it best to make the decision by asking myself if I’ll be happy in ten years, no matter the outcome.
A litmus test I use: Am I deciding to be myself and follow what I want, or am I deciding to try to manage the future?
Because that is a strong indicator of whether I’m being true to myself.
If it’s the latter, I don’t take the action.
Notice
Falling into binary thinking around a decision signals that you’re operating from fear.
It’s an indicator that your system is overwhelmed and attempting to establish a sense of control. The antidote to this is wonder.
Binary thinking sounds like “Should I stay in this relationship?”
Wonder sounds like “What would I need to do to feel good about staying in this relationship?”
Watch
Big Love,
Joe